Note: As ads are used to drive traffic to your website where you capture email addresses. It is important to write persuasive ads that get the click. In this series, I rewrite live Facebook ads to make them scroll stopping, eye-catching, and click-grabbing.
Context:
This ad is for an online painting course
Original Ad:
Because I love painting, and I want others to not have the stresses and worries I had as I was building my painting skills, I decided to create “Acrylic Painting for Beginners”! I share all of my processes, techniques, and tricks that have taken me decades to learn and perfect, with you in simple step by step videos!
🎨I am now offering my best course to date on Acrylic Painting For Beginners! Get it today!
Headline: 🎨Learn To Paint With LaurieAnne🎨
Description: Start Painting Today!
Score:
Flow ❌
Empathy ❌
Clarity ❌
Believability ✅
Verbiage ❌
Rewrite Version:
Have you ever seen a painting and immediately felt the desire to try painting yourself?
That's how it starts for most artists. With a desire to create beautiful artwork.
But most people find it challenging to begin…
They try to figure out what supplies to use, how to mix colors, and where exactly to start their artistic journey.
And they get overwhelmed, frustrated, and give up on our artistic ambition even before it begins.
You see, there is an artist within each of us...
But it needs nurturing, guidance, and a step-by-step approach to learning how to paint.
Hi, I'm Laurie - I love to paint.
And I have been fortunate enough to make a living doing what I love.
I have created a course, 'Acrylic Painting For Beginners' for aspiring artists like you.
Learn to paint even if you are a beginner...
You don't need to know anything except a desire to learn and the joy of creating art.
I will guide you through the process, techniques, and tricks to paint like a professional…
Something that took me years to learn.
Create artworks that can become wallpaper on your iPhone or even hang in an art gallery…
It's not as far-fetched as you think.
Click below to start your artistic journey.
And get a special 70% discount for a limited time.
Headline: Create Beautiful Acrylic Paintings
Description: Special 70% discount for a limited time
What Changed:
First, you’ll notice that it is visually much easier to read. I have broken from one chunk of block to small bits.
Second, I shift the focus away from “me” to the reader. I talk about their desires and their struggles. And how difficult it is to begin creating art.
Third, I introduce the instructor who is here to help “you”. And make this journey as easy as possible with her product.
Fourth, I show them the outcome. They can create beautiful artworks for themselves or for the public.
Fifth, I introduce the offer. Avail 70% off.
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